I love that Mistress controls when & if i may cum
I love that Mistress will decide that, that may well be only ever an if and possibly never a when
I love knowing that if i am ever permitted release it will most likely be a milking and not an orgasm
I love the fact that knowing this makes me ache to cum & knowing that i may not
I love hearing Her reiterate Her implacable position makes me ache immeasurable more
I love the fact that knowing i may not come makes me ache for so much for Her
I love the fact that i ache to please Her but never as a man
I love thinking about Her before i go to sleep and when i first wake up
I love aching to kiss Her intimately
I love thinking apprehensively about Her strap on
I love the wistful hope that the only orgasm i will experience with Her will be Hers & Hers only
I love hoping that She will enjoy watching a Man cum in my mouth, whilst knowing that a sissy  may never cum like that
I love the fear that one day She will want to watch a Man take me from behind
I love the fact that writing this has made me so hot and flustered
I love being a sissy for Her and longing for Her
Thank You Mistress
Curtsy